Monday Morning Micro Madness Presents:

The Call-In

By S.T. Hoover

“Welcome back, guys and gals and ghouls and gals again! This is Radical Ryan coming at you from deep in the heart of Omaha, Nebraska! On your way to work? I hope not! Traffic’s been backed up for the last year and a half! Not an inch of movement since the dead rose again! You know it, I know it, but maybe someone out there missed it! If that’s you, our number is all threes, baby! Yep, it’s real! How? Call in and find out!

“Weather today is lookin’ a little cold, but that ain’t stoppin’ the walkers. Nope, I can see ’em right out my window! There’s a three-walker pileup on Mission Drive! Looks like they pinned a stray dog against a car. Wait, is that…? Well, ladies and gentlemen, it looks like someone is finally using my car for something!

“Now, on to sports. There aren’t any. Politics? Who knows! Gossip? I don’t know. Nobody’s called in for over a year now! There’s still a dial tone but who knows if the damn thing really works! I guess no one else was as smart as me! Or as fortunate to be sitting on top of a two-year supply of army rations! See, Mom? Playing all those zombie games was good for something!

“Anyway, it’s time for our song of the week! Prepare for ‘What’s New, Pussycat?’ seventeen times in a… OH MY GOD! OH MY GOD! Someone’s calling! Hello? Are you there? You survived? Where are you?”

“Hey man, you suck!”

CLICK.